October 2088. Jordan Graham is 28, Maria Boone is 26.
PG-13, but some links are NSFW
previously: who wants all that baggage?
Good morning, lovers.
Optional spicy interlude: “i want you for breakfast” spice level = 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
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After a long morning in bed, these spoiled lovers worked up quite an appetite. So they made themselves decent and went outside to the grill. Jordan promised breakfast, and he intended to deliver, even though he felt a bit silly cooking for a woman who cooked for a living. But Maria wasn’t a snob. And besides, she couldn’t say she’d ever had kid-approved cheddar scrambled eggs with a dash of smokehouse grilling salt.
Breakfast was good, their conversation was better, and the lingering euphoria of their long morning in bed filled the day with an ever-present bliss. The morning was turning out to be every bit as magical as their night had been. It was easy to forget that there was anything serious to talk about. Who wanted to spoil their last hours with seriousness?
These hours felt important and meaningful, pivotal even in ways that were becoming more and more clear as the hours went on.
Their only concern now was what to do with themselves next, after they both agreed that a fourth round in bed would be too much.
“Do you want to go somewhere?”
“Kind of no?” she said.
“Do you want to walk a little?”
“You can’t sit still, can you? Didn’t I wear you out enough?”
“Sorry, babe, I’m the energizer bunny,” he said.
She laughed. “Well, you definitely wore me out.”
“There’s a little farmers’ market you might like,” he said. “And we can walk down by the river. It’ll be easy. It’s not very far. You can see it from the window.”
“Okay,” she said, tackling him back down to the bed. “But five more minutes of this first.”
They got dressed properly and ventured back outside. Before they set out, Maria owed Johanna a “good morning” phone call. The little girl had waited patiently through the morning and two time zones to hear from them. She was amused to see them both on screen together.
Then they wandered down to the farmer’s market. The offerings were a little past their season, but they were charmed nonetheless. He picked out some late season tomatoes and a flower for her, too. He thought it was hilarious when she gave him one back.
They walked down by the river, where they found a quaint little bridge. They stopped to listen to the water rush under their feet, the birds chattering in the trees, and distant voices from the market.
“Do you want to eat fish for lunch?” he asked.
“Like from the river?’
“Sure. Fresh trout.”
“Eww! No way!”
He could feel the soft bubbling of her giggles on his back.
“But you cook fish at work,” he said.
“That’s different.”
“Different how?”
“Because it’s already dead, and gutted, and cut into filets.”
“Okay, so if I did all that first?”
“And wrap it in paper like from the store.”
He laughed. “Okay, noted. I’ll go buy some wax paper.”
“Wait,” she said, “It’s not lunch time is it?”
The playful air grew instantly heavy and all of the magic dissipated.
“Uh, we had a late breakfast,” he said. “It’s past noon now, almost one.”
“One? How?”
It was a hard crash back to reality. They knew all along that parting from each other after only twenty-four hours was going to be torture. She had a train to catch at five. And the hours went on. Tick, tick, tick. The hours began to feel like panic.
“So, same time next month?” she said, and then she began to sob.
“I’m sorry,” she cried, “I’m sorry.” The crying grew and she couldn’t stop it. Between sobs, she also laughed, and he really didn’t know what to make of that. “I was trying to be funny,” she explained.
He pulled her to his shoulder. “I know it’s not funny,” he said. She hid her face in him, where she continued to cry into his shirt.
They couldn’t go on like this. It wasn’t working now, and it would only continue to grow more difficult to the point where they finally broke. Make or break it, now or never, all or nothing. If he didn’t have it in him to ask her right now, it was over already.
“Hey, come sit down with me,” he said. “I have an idea.”
“I always kind of knew this would be too hard on you,” he started. “I didn’t want to put you through that.”
Her face went stone cold with worry and he suspected he had this wrong already.
“Shit, I mean, you’re right,” he said. “I know you are. I didn’t know it then, but I know now. We had to try. Because what was the alternative? Not trying? That would have been tragic, because this is so good. We just need it to be more.”
She exhaled heavily. “I’m listening.”
“We need more, but I’m also not ready to quit this. To be honest, I don’t know if I’ll ever want to quit this.”
“I don’t want you to quit,” she said.
“But do I have to lose you? Because I can’t lose you. Please, I don’t want to lose you. But I also don’t want to go back to some house in the suburbs in Wisconsin and work some shitty nine-to-five to pay for it all. I mean, Wisconsin is okay. But staying in one place, one apartment, one job, day after day. Remember I told you that?”
“I remember,” she said.
“Then this is going to sound crazy, but please hear me out… What if you went back home, grab Johanna, pack some things if you want. Or don’t—things are just things. And come back. Be with me here, or wherever. Everywhere. Every day?”
His proposal didn’t send her running for the hills, but she still had a cautious look on her face. “For how long? You’re not allowed to say 'as long as I want.' I want to know what you want.”
He had been too wishy-washy and he’d lost her trust. Maybe he deserved that. He remembered the way he first pitched this plan to her, his grand idea for how this could all work, seeing each other here and there, putting it back on the shelf. That was never going to work. How they were together deserved to be much more than that.
“That’s fair.” He chuckled with nerves, but now was not the time to be shy. “Not just for a few days. Not just for a little while. Not once a month or every other weekend. And, maybe I shouldn’t ask you this. You shouldn’t quit your job and your whole life, especially not for a guy like me. You shouldn’t. But would you? Because what if you did, and what if you loved it? What if we were happy? What if we had the most amazing life together? Now and every day and… until you get sick of me?”
She shook her head. “But then what? What if I don’t get sick of you?” She was digging her heels in on this one. She was gonna make him say it.
“Then I guess we’re in it for life? I want us to have an amazing life together.”
“Those are big words, mister,” she said. “Are you sure you’re ready for all that?”
“Haven’t I had a lot of time to think about things?”
The look on her face was not shock, like he expected, but weight and decision. What she had decided, he wasn’t entirely sure yet.
“It’s too selfish, maybe,” he said. “I know you never imagined living like this. I know it’s not fair, and I know it’s asking you to make all the sacrifices while I get everything I want. I hate that, but you won’t hate it. I’ll make sure of it. It’s too much to ask. I want too much.”
She wasn’t stunned. She was surprisingly calm and rational about it all. She took one slow breath and exhaled it, and he knew she’d just settled whatever answer she had in her head.
“I want too much, too,” she said. “Don’t you think I’m asking for a lot? This isn’t just about me, you know.”
“I know,” he said. “I do know that. I’m thinking about her, too. And my boys, too— and, well, I don’t get to decide for them, but I think they would all be good friends if we had them together. And I think she’d thrive out here, with us, with the adventures and the nature and the experiences. She would love it.”
“Okay, then I think my ask is bigger, because it’s for two people.”
“I always kind of knew this would be too hard on you,” he started. “I didn’t want to put you through that.”
Her face went stone cold with worry and he suspected he had this wrong already.
“Shit, I mean, you’re right,” he said. “I know you are. I didn’t know it then, but I know now. We had to try. Because what was the alternative? Not trying? That would have been tragic, because this is so good. We just need it to be more.”
She exhaled heavily. “I’m listening.”
“We need more, but I’m also not ready to quit this. To be honest, I don’t know if I’ll ever want to quit this.”
“I don’t want you to quit,” she said.
“But do I have to lose you? Because I can’t lose you. Please, I don’t want to lose you. But I also don’t want to go back to some house in the suburbs in Wisconsin and work some shitty nine-to-five to pay for it all. I mean, Wisconsin is okay. But staying in one place, one apartment, one job, day after day. Remember I told you that?”
“I remember,” she said.
“Then this is going to sound crazy, but please hear me out… What if you went back home, grab Johanna, pack some things if you want. Or don’t—things are just things. And come back. Be with me here, or wherever. Everywhere. Every day?”
His proposal didn’t send her running for the hills, but she still had a cautious look on her face. “For how long? You’re not allowed to say 'as long as I want.' I want to know what you want.”
He had been too wishy-washy and he’d lost her trust. Maybe he deserved that. He remembered the way he first pitched this plan to her, his grand idea for how this could all work, seeing each other here and there, putting it back on the shelf. That was never going to work. How they were together deserved to be much more than that.
“That’s fair.” He chuckled with nerves, but now was not the time to be shy. “Not just for a few days. Not just for a little while. Not once a month or every other weekend. And, maybe I shouldn’t ask you this. You shouldn’t quit your job and your whole life, especially not for a guy like me. You shouldn’t. But would you? Because what if you did, and what if you loved it? What if we were happy? What if we had the most amazing life together? Now and every day and… until you get sick of me?”
She shook her head. “But then what? What if I don’t get sick of you?” She was digging her heels in on this one. She was gonna make him say it.
“Then I guess we’re in it for life? I want us to have an amazing life together.”
“Those are big words, mister,” she said. “Are you sure you’re ready for all that?”
“Haven’t I had a lot of time to think about things?”
The look on her face was not shock, like he expected, but weight and decision. What she had decided, he wasn’t entirely sure yet.
“It’s too selfish, maybe,” he said. “I know you never imagined living like this. I know it’s not fair, and I know it’s asking you to make all the sacrifices while I get everything I want. I hate that, but you won’t hate it. I’ll make sure of it. It’s too much to ask. I want too much.”
She wasn’t stunned. She was surprisingly calm and rational about it all. She took one slow breath and exhaled it, and he knew she’d just settled whatever answer she had in her head.
“I want too much, too,” she said. “Don’t you think I’m asking for a lot? This isn’t just about me, you know.”
“I know,” he said. “I do know that. I’m thinking about her, too. And my boys, too— and, well, I don’t get to decide for them, but I think they would all be good friends if we had them together. And I think she’d thrive out here, with us, with the adventures and the nature and the experiences. She would love it.”
“Okay, then I think my ask is bigger, because it’s for two people.”
“Go on,” he said, “You can ask it.”
“Really?” Now she looked nervous. Maybe she hadn’t prepared herself to be on the asking end of their proposals today, but it was kind of now or never for them. No more of this limbo. No more indecision.
“Ask it,” he said.
“I’m asking you not to break my baby’s heart,” she said. “If you want to be part of her life, well, that’s a promise. It’s one you don’t take back. My heart, it doesn’t matter, I’ve done heartbreak before, I can deal. But not her.”
“Your heart matters,” he said. “But I promise I won’t break Johanna’s heart, and I won’t break yours, either. You can trust me. I need you to trust me.”
“I want to,” she said. “Can I ask you something else?”
“Anything.”
“What happens if we don’t like it? All the moving and everything?”
“If you hate it, then we’ll try something else. Together. But I don’t think you’ll hate it. Whatever you don’t like, I’ll fix it. You just tell me what it is, and we can fix it. You won’t hate it because every day will be an adventure. Every day will be new and fun and exciting. It will never feel like putting it back on the shelf, because even if we never stay in the same place, we’ll be constant, because we’ll be together. Every day together. What do you think? Would you think about it?”
He made himself a vow that he would never make this woman cry again, but here her eyes were welling with tears. Maybe this time they were happy ones?
“Jordan, I already have thought about it. I was waiting for you to ask.”
“So, what do you say?”
“Okay,” she said.
“Okay?”
“Yeah, let’s do it.”
He swept her back into his arms and buried a dozen kisses in her neck while she burst into giggles.
“You won’t be sorry,” he said. “I promise you won’t.”
With their entire future ahead of them, Jordan got carried away with all his plans. As they walked back to camp, he dreamed of Colorado, Washington, and California. Canada! Why not? He even wondered if they could drive a camper into Mexico.
“You’re still supposed to be training,” she reminded him. “Isn’t that the point of all this?”
“Not the only point,” he said. “I can miss a couple sessions if we get to see something amazing together.”
“Don’t we have forever to see amazing things together?”
“Oh, I guess we do,” he said, grinning, as if it continued to dawn on him in every passing moment. There was no hurry anymore. It would never be too late. They would never run out of time.
Their last few hours went quickly, but that was no great worry. Not anymore. They’d been too desperate to reconnect to prioritize sleep, but now, as the pressure of time lost its power, they realized how tired they were.
They set a timer for a little catnap.
Then, when all their time was spent, he drove her back into town to catch the 5:00 train.
“Okay, so, see you soon,” she said.
He grinned playfully. “Tomorrow?”
“Ha ha, maybe not that soon. As soon as I can. How about a few days? You’ll be okay?”
“I don’t know, I might die of loneliness.”
“You’ll be fine,” she said. “Go climbing with your friends. I need to figure out Jojo’s school, my job, all my bills, my house, all my stuff…”
She looked slightly stunned.
“Are you changing your mind?” he asked.
“No, I’m not. It’s just a lot.”
“I know it’s a lot,” he said. “Thank you. I’ll make it up to you. You’ll never be disappointed. You’ll never be sorry.”
She nodded. “Hmm, you know, I believe you.”
“Don’t worry too much. You don’t need to decide everything right now. We’ll be back there in December to figure out more. How much can you bring on the train in a suitcase anyway? Just do what needs to be done, and come back to me quick.”
“I will.”
That evening, Maria got on the 80-East train from Sierra Nova to Chicago. As it turned out, the goodbye they’d been dreading for weeks only left them feeling happy, hopeful, and filled to the brim with plans. Because it wasn’t a goodbye after all, it was the beginning of their whole future.
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a ridiculous amount of gameplay notes and extras:
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Wow. I wasn't expecting that! Very curious to see how this will go for them. I'm someone who sort of thrives on routine and stability, so my immediate thought is "disaster!", lol. But I guess that's really yet to be determined.
ReplyDeleteOh, I’m kind of delighted you didn’t see this coming, because I worried I was being obvious to death, lol! I do like to leave a little mystery and surprise in the twists and turns of things, but also have to make sure it doesn’t come out of nowhere. It’s a tricky balance.
DeleteI think Maria has lived a life very similar to what you describe. She’s been sheltered and her choices were doubted, and some of that is her own doing. It must be very scary for someone who has only known stability and protection to take a chance on something like this. I think Maria’s whole world is about to be split wide open. Will she like what she finds?
Thank you for reading! ❤️